John 1:1-5: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was with God in the beginning. 3 Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4 In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
It was 6:30 in the morning, still dark outside, when I rolled out of bed to start the day. Time to prepare breakfast for my oldest and pump milk for the little one. After a flurry of activity, my eldest finally sat down to a warm bowl of pasta with broth and eggs. The portable pump was already filling up with milk for the baby, and I whispered a silent prayer to God, asking for just ten more minutes of peace. I hoped the baby would stay asleep until his brother finished eating and headed off to school. That way, I could prepare everything in calm, maybe catch a few moments of rest before driving to work in Elon.
But life had other plans. Just as I was about to sit down, my mother, who is staying with us, also woke up. She has mild dementia, and every day with her brings a few unexpected surprises. Suddenly, she let out two loud sneezes that reverberated through our thin walls, and before I knew it, the baby was awake and crying. My carefully arranged morning was swiftly unraveling. My eldest, not quite ready to leave, was still chatting with me, now intrigued by his crying brother. My mother-in-law seemed unsure of what to do, and my husband, eager to help, scooped up the baby, asking me what he should do. Frustrated, I snapped, “You’re never this enthusiastic any other time! Just give me a couple of minutes; I had everything under control.”
In that instant, my morning lost its light. Rushing, I fed the baby, hoping he’d go back to sleep. Then, I slipped away to the bathroom, feeling drained. It was in that quiet moment the Holy Spirit whispered to me, reminding me to draw near to God to find balance and strength. I paused, letting the warmth of that reminder fill my heart. God’s life and peace were already within me—I didn’t need to control every detail. These moments of chaos were God’s gentle lessons in humility and patience.
With this realization, I returned to my husband, apologizing for my frustration and thanking him for his help. The baby didn’t fall back asleep as I had hoped, but instead, I gently held him, snuggling up together on our bed. My husband and I both kissed his tiny face, sharing a moment of joy and calm I hadn’t planned but deeply cherished. It became clear: God’s plan was indeed the best.
This morning taught me that the peace I seek isn’t found in controlling every aspect of life, but in trusting God’s guidance and accepting whatever He places before me. When I slowed down and prayed, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the light and strength already within me, a gift from my heavenly Father. I didn’t need to struggle for control; I only needed to surrender, with humility and patience, to God’s will.
Embracing this truth brought me peace, allowing me to see the morning not as a failure but as a reminder of God’s unfailing presence. And in those quiet moments, the real light and peace, beyond any worldly chaos, began to shine in my life.
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